Boring John Healey succeeds in making UK Budget low key - and not annoying too many people
Although dull, the Chancellor’s statement will likely have achieved what it intended by not annoying too many people
The UK Government had briefed out before the event that the Budget would be a low-key affair.
By god John Healey made sure of that. The Chancellor could not have been any more dull.
Former House of Representatives Speaker Nancy Pelosi showed up in the gallery during Scotland Office questions, which kicked the day off.
After all those years on Capitol Hill she got to see a true political spectacle: Douglas Alexander slag off the SNP in the House of Commons.
The Prime Minister’s Questions which followed, despite being overshadowed by the Budget, was still pretty upbeat.
With a packed chamber and Labour MPs up for it, there was a decent atmosphere.
Andy Burnham gave Ms Pelosi a wave before he took his seat, while the American responded with a thumbs up.
Exactly half an hour later (for once), the PM’s session finished and Mr Healey was up to give his first Budget since becoming Chancellor in the summer.
He quickly sucked all energy out of the room. Ms Pelosi must have only been there to see the Scottish Secretary do his thing, as she left less than 15 minutes into Mr Healey’s statement.
The Chancellor spoke slowly, in a way that commanded the room during his Labour Conference speech last month.
It didn’t work this time round, and only succeeded in boring everyone present.
He made quite a big gaffe at one point when he mistakenly said that Energy Secretary Miatta Fahnbulleh “opposed” the Jackdaw gas field.
Laughs erupted across the chamber, while Mr Healey good-naturedly chucked and corrected himself, saying she had approved the project.
Ms Fahnbulleh - reported to be against both Jackdaw and Rosebank oil field - gave a smile and laughed, but she looked embarrassed.
The Scottish Labour MPs did not seem much impressed by the Chancellor’s tepid performance.
Central Ayrshire MP Alan Gemmell spent a fair amount of time on his phone. Glenrothes and Mid Fife MP Richard Baker yawned as Mr Healey drawled on, even sitting back with his eyes shut at one point.
Glasgow East’s John Grady sat glumly behind the Chancellor, while Falkirk MP Euan Stainbank was on the edge of his seat, waiting for an announcement which never came.
It was very different to Budgets of days gone by.
Rachel Reeves, who was not in the chamber when Mr Healey made his statement, was not particularly charismatic.
She was not a natural speaker, often appearing nervous, and her speech was sometimes stilted.
But at least you got the sense that she was up for it and recognised the significance of the occasion.
She got her own MPs excited as she laid into the Tories and defended her measures, even if they did not agree with everything she said.
Mr Healey never seemed to get out of second gear. Sometimes a calm and composed manner works in politics.
It can suggest the person speaking has a sensible head on their shoulders.
But on this occasion it fell flat on its face.
Read more: Budget 2026 LIVE: Chancellor John Healey's spending plans and what they mean for Scotland
The Chancellor’s attempt to bore everyone to death were helped by Deputy Speaker Nus Ghani.
She kept interrupting the Chancellor, reprimanding individual Tory MPs for shouting across the chamber.
Sometimes the House of Commons is so raucous that it can be a struggle to hear whoever is speaking for the Government, forcing the speaker to intervene.
Today was not one of those days.
In part because the Chancellor was so soft and not antagonistic in his style, the Tories gave little audible reaction while he spoke.
Unlike most days in the Commons, it was never difficult to hear him speaking over noise from the opposition.
But Ms Ghani seemed intent on becoming part of the story.
She singled out MPs on several occasions. At no point were they even putting Mr Healey off, never mind drowning him out.
The worst moment was towards the end of Mr Healey’s statement.
It was the only point where he got animated. As he was rising to his climax, setting out his stall for Labour’s argument behind the Budget, Ms Ghani rose to her feet, stopping him in his tracks.
She told off a random Tory who had not been speaking loudly enough to be heard in the press gallery directly above him.
Mr Healey then resumed where he had left off, but with just a couple of lines left, it meant the end of his speech had no real impact.
In terms of content, there was not much to get excited about.
The rabbit out of the hat was £100 of energy support for households in council tax bands A to D.
Although this does not apply in Scotland, the Chancellor encouraged the SNP Government to introduce the same measure north of the border with the extra money it receives in Barnett consequentials.
A damp squib Budget was what the UK Government was after: that’s why they were briefing it out beforehand.
This new Labour administration wants to appear like it is steadying the ship while giving a bit of a hand on the cost of living.
Andy Burnham has been popular so far, with the government having detoxified after the hatred towards Sir Keir Starmer.
The Chancellor probably overdid the reassuring act, instead forcing everyone watching live to switch off.
Perhaps they went for a safer approach after seeing how Ms Reeves’ two Budgets annoyed much of the public.
It will likely have done what it intended by not putting too many people off the PM and Labour.
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